Let it go, let it goooooooo

Change the headline

👆 Literally that is what the template says and it is correct. Let’s change the focus up. I am was so upset on Wednesday and I own that, I needed that, if I didn’t get upset then, I just would have done later. Now it’s done and resident hair wizard cousin Kerry has spoken. She has given me instructions for now and we will have a real conversation when I get home and go from there. Until then it’s done and when we get there it is time for a bold adventure 🏴‍☠️

But anyway for me, the simple act of writing down the moment makes it easier to let go of it.

So I woke up yesterday – after a night of broken sleep and disrupted pain killers and decided to do something different.

As soon as there was a whisper of home last week, my brain moved onto ‘Thank you’s’ and I wanted to start with Hosptial staff and ideally have those cards ready for when I leave …

I managed my first two for Efa and Veda from Intensive Care barely … in pain and and then exhausted I fell asleep for a couple of hours. But they were worth it! Zzzzzzzz

In all fairness … they were in depth. I don’t want just a basic thank you card, I want something that really explains how they made me feel, something that will hopefully be very special to them personally and professionally to know that their actions contributed to a feeling or memory that I will carry for with me going forwards.

Read here about Efa and Veda 🙌

As miserable humans we are programmed only to comment on the bad … and believe me there have been some BAAAAAD moments during my 6 weeks in hospital and I think when I am home I may do a post focusing on this … because that is going to get political and quickly so I probably should have less of Maurice’s influence when I write it. Especially just having a look at proposed #NHS pay rise … 🙈 it is an embarrassment.

A thank you to my friend and colleague Markus for teaching the simple but incredibly effective art of Appreciation. I have tried to do this since Markus led the exercise and the more you practice the easier it does become. ☺️

It has also changed my own headspace and stopped me (if only for the moment,) looking inwards and feeling sad about all that I have been through. Instead I am looking at the positives in those around me. It is so lovely to give people positive feedback and is giving me a positive feeling too.

So for example I need to write a thank you to Caroline the Occupational Therapist.

Caroline is funny and compassionate. She has pushed me, but never further than I needed. Some days she walked into my room to be greeted by an emotional wreck and she would sit and listen to me cry and hold my hand, make me a cup of tea and set a time to come back and see me later on. She would be back later and I would be ready and off we would go. Each time Caroline would point out where we would go tomorrow if I am feeling strong enough just a little further along the corridor … and now I realise she was playing me 😂 because I always said, no let’s do it now. Beastly woman. I take it all back. She is terrible! 😂

But that is why she is so great, so quickly she gets to know you and understands what she needs to do to get you to work.

There are so many thanks for Caroline to fit into an A6 card. Should have bought bigger cards or gone for a straight forward ‘ta’ 😂 😂

So thank you cards and hard core napping have consumed my Friday and Saturday so far and most likely Sunday too plus a little #F1 #TeamLH44 🏎.

My non hospital thank you list is prepared and I need to get those cards ready for when I get home.

I really wanted to leave the cards for staff on my discharge, I know that Shift patterns and holidays mean that won’t mean they will get them immediately but I want to be sure they get them, while they still remember me … I just need them to know what they have done for me and how much I appreciate it.

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I will write my non hospital cards next week probably. I have no idea how/where to start with them – but again, I need people to understand how their individual actions have helped me in this so far.

I am going to do cards for Mum, Dad, Lisa and Louise … lol might need to get a small notepad really!

100% how I feel right now 👆❤️